Build stronger client connections and close more deals with proven psychological principles of ethical persuasion.
The 7 Principles of Influence: Overview
1
Reciprocity
People feel obligated to return favors and acts of kindness
2
Commitment & Consistency
People align with their previous statements, beliefs, and actions
3
Social Proof
People follow what others similar to them are doing
4
Authority
People trust and follow credible experts and leaders
5
Liking
People say yes to those they like and relate to personally
6
Scarcity
People value and pursue what is rare, exclusive, or limited
7
Unity
People are influenced by those they identify with as part of their group
Principle 1: Reciprocity
People feel obligated to return favors and acts of kindness.
Practical Application
Key Considerations
Pitfalls to Avoid
Principle 2: Commitment & Consistency
People align with their previous statements, beliefs, and actions.
Practical Application
Key Considerations
Pitfalls to Avoid
Principle 3: Social Proof
People follow what others similar to them are doing.
Practical Application
Key Considerations
Pitfalls to Avoid
Principle 4: Authority
People trust and follow credible experts and leaders.
Practical Application
Key Considerations
Pitfalls to Avoid
Principle 5: Liking
People say yes to those they like and relate to personally.
Practical Application
Key Considerations
Pitfalls to Avoid
Principle 6: Scarcity
People value and pursue what is rare, exclusive, or limited.
Practical Application
Key Considerations
Pitfalls to Avoid
Principle 7: Unity
People are influenced by those they identify with as part of their group.
Practical Application
Key Considerations
Pitfalls to Avoid
Distinguishing Unity and Social Proof
Unity focuses on the innate human desire to connect, feel accepted, and be part of a group, fostering a sense of shared identity and belonging. This is about making prospects feel they are joining a community of friends and a supportive family, not just buying a home.
In contrast, Social Proof influences behavior by demonstrating what peers are doing, implying that certain actions are correct or desirable because many people are engaging in them.
While both are powerful, Unity delves into a deeper, shared identity, whereas Social Proof leverages observable peer behavior.
Group Exercise: Applying the 7 Principles
Now that we've explored each of the 7 Principles of Influence, let's put them into practice with a collaborative exercise designed to deepen our understanding and spark innovative applications.
1
Form 7 Groups
We'll divide into 7 groups, with each group assigned one of the core principles: Reciprocity, Commitment & Consistency, Social Proof, Authority, Liking, Scarcity, or Unity.
2
Identify Current Examples
For your assigned principle, discuss and identify a couple of real-world examples where you see this principle in action within our communities today. Think about local initiatives, community events, or even everyday interactions.
3
Leverage with Unreasonable Hospitality
Brainstorm ways we can further leverage your assigned principle by adopting an Unreasonable Hospitality mindset. How can we apply this principle in ways that are exceptionally generous, memorable, and go far beyond expectations?
4
Prepare to Share
Each group will have a few minutes to share their examples and innovative ideas with the larger audience.
Inspired by the philosophy of going beyond mere service, Unreasonable Hospitality transforms routine interactions into extraordinary experiences. In sales, this means shifting from transactional exchanges to building genuine relationships.
Surprise & Delight
Identify opportunities to exceed customer expectations, delivering unexpected value or personalized gestures that leave a lasting impression.
Build Authentic Connections
Focus on understanding individual needs and preferences, creating a sense of genuine care and partnership rather than just pushing a product/service.
Create Lasting Impressions
Craft unique interactions that customers will remember and share, turning them into advocates for your brand and fostering loyalty beyond a single sale.
Foster Long-Term Value
By prioritizing exceptional experiences, we cultivate trust that leads to repeat business, referrals, and a stronger, more resilient customer base.
Group Exercise Worksheet
Use this template to structure your group's discussion and prepare for your presentation. Record your assigned principle, real-world examples, and innovative applications below.
Your Assigned Principle
___________________________________
(Write your group's assigned principle here, e.g., "Reciprocity")
Current Examples
Identify 2-3 real-world instances where your assigned principle is currently observed or applied.
_________________________________________________
_________________________________________________
_________________________________________________
Unreasonable Hospitality Applications
Brainstorm 2-3 creative ways to leverage this principle with an "Unreasonable Hospitality" mindset.
People feel obligated to return favors and acts of kindness.
Definition
The innate human tendency to respond to a positive action with another positive action, often by repaying received favors. It activates when we receive something first, especially if it's unexpected and valuable.
Key Learnings
Be the first to give: Offer value or a gesture of goodwill without explicit conditions.
Make it unexpected: Surprise clients with gestures, making the act feel more genuine and less transactional.
Personalize the value: Ensure your offering is meaningful and tailored to the individual client's needs or preferences.
Pitfalls to Avoid
Appearing manipulative: Gifts with clear, immediate strings attached can breed distrust.
Over-gifting or irrelevance: Excessive or inappropriate gestures can make clients uncomfortable or devalue the principle.
People align with their previous statements, beliefs, and actions.
Definition
The human tendency to act in ways that are consistent with their past declarations, beliefs, and behaviors. Once a commitment is made, individuals are more likely to honor it to maintain coherence in their self-image and with others.
Key Learnings
Seek Small Commitments: Encourage clients to agree to small, initial steps to build momentum.
Reference Stated Priorities: Link your proposals and solutions back to their explicit goals and values.
Facilitate Consistency: Help clients follow through on their decisions and align actions with their stated beliefs.
Pitfalls to Avoid
Forcing Commitments: Pressuring clients can backfire, leading to resentment or superficial agreement.
Being Too Rigid: Insisting on past positions without adapting to new information or circumstances.
Ignoring Evolving Perspectives: Failing to acknowledge genuine changes in a client's mind or priorities.
Principle 3: Social Proof
People follow what others similar to them are doing.Definition
People follow what others similar to them are doing.
Key Learnings
Showcase testimonials: Highlight positive experiences and endorsements from satisfied clients.
Highlight community success stories: Share narratives of how groups or similar clients have benefited.
Demonstrate popularity: Show that many others are adopting or endorsing your solution.
Pitfalls to Avoid
Using fake testimonials: Inauthentic endorsements erode trust and credibility.
Overwhelming with too many examples: Too much social proof can be distracting or feel inauthentic.
Not matching the right social proof to the right audience: Irrelevant examples won't resonate.
Principle 4: Authority
People trust and follow credible experts and leaders.
Definition
The inherent human tendency to defer to those perceived as having superior knowledge, experience, or position. This trust is built on perceived competence, integrity, and reliability, leading individuals to follow guidance from established experts.
Key Learnings
Establish visible expertise: Actively demonstrate your deep knowledge and understanding in your field through actions and content.
Showcase credentials and experience: Highlight relevant qualifications, achievements, and a successful track record to build trust.
Share knowledge generously: Provide valuable insights and guidance freely to build credibility and help others grow.
Pitfalls to Avoid
Appearing arrogant or dismissive: Presenting oneself as superior without genuine helpfulness can alienate others and erode trust.
Over-credentialing: Excessive self-promotion of titles or achievements can come across as insecure or boastful, diminishing impact.
Using authority to intimidate: Leveraging power to coerce rather than guide undermines respect and long-term relationships.
Principle 5: Liking
People say yes to those they like and relate to personally.
Definition
The tendency for individuals to be more persuaded by, and agreeable to, those they know and like. This influence is strengthened by factors like similarity, compliments, and cooperation.
Key Learnings
Find Common Ground: Actively seek shared interests, experiences, or values to create an immediate sense of connection.
Offer Genuine Compliments: Sincerely acknowledge positive qualities or achievements; flattery that isn't genuine can backfire.
Build Authentic Rapport: Invest time in understanding and connecting with others on a personal level, beyond the transactional.
Pitfalls to Avoid
Being Fake or Manipulative: Insincere attempts to build liking are easily detected and erode trust.
Over-Complimenting: Excessive or unwarranted praise can come across as disingenuous or condescending.
Forcing Unnatural Connections: Trying too hard to find common ground or relate can appear forced and uncomfortable.
Principle 6: Scarcity
People value and pursue what is rare, exclusive, or limited.
Definition
The psychological phenomenon where the perceived limited availability of something increases its desirability. This principle leverages the human tendency to want things more when they are rare, exclusive, or difficult to obtain.
Key Learnings
Highlight genuine limitations: Clearly communicate when something is truly limited, such as a restricted number of spots, a specific timeframe, or unique resources.
Create exclusive experiences: Offer unique opportunities or privileged access that is not widely available, fostering a sense of special membership.
Emphasize unique value: Showcase what makes your offering distinct and irreplaceable, reinforcing its premium and rare nature.
Pitfalls to Avoid
Creating false scarcity: Misrepresenting availability can severely damage trust and long-term credibility.
Being too pushy with deadlines: Overly aggressive or artificial deadlines can alienate potential Members and seem manipulative.
Making everything seem urgent: If every offer is presented as "urgent" or "limited," it loses its impact and authenticity over time.
Principle 7: Unity
People are influenced by those they identify with as part of their group.
Definition
The psychological principle where individuals are more likely to be influenced by and trust those they perceive as being part of their 'in-group'. This involves shared identity, values, or experiences that create a sense of belonging.
Key Learnings
Foster shared identity: Highlight commonalities, shared goals, or collective experiences to create a sense of 'us'.
Emphasize common values: Articulate and reinforce the values that unite your community or client base.
Build inclusive communities: Create opportunities for people to connect and belong to a group, making them feel special and understood.
Pitfalls to Avoid
Excluding genuinely interested parties: Being overly exclusive can alienate potential members who share values.
Creating superficial 'tribes': Building groups based on false commonalities can lead to disingenuous connections.
Being overly insular: A group that is too exclusive risks stagnation and a lack of fresh perspectives.